Thursday, March 09, 2006

Splenda AND Scrubs - in the SAME post!!

Anyone catch this week's Scrubs, mmm? Best line to me, when the grief counselor Dr. Hedrick got ripped a new one by Cox, didn't even blink, and held up a packet of Splenda and said "God I don't care if these cause cancer, I just love this fake sugar so much!!"

Love it.

More Sports Guy, for you Houston types

Same mailbag as the Peet's/Starbucks routine:
SG: Hey, Hartford may be dangerous, ugly, uncool, and poorly laid-out … but at least everyone there knows it. Everyone in Houston is in denial. Put it this way: When you ask the concierge of a major hotel in Houston where you should go in the city to walk around, do some sightseeing and kill a couple of hours, and that concierge thinks about it for a few seconds, hems and haws, then refers you to the Galleria Mall and tells you, "That's really about it," then your city sucks to visit. I hate to break it to you.

On Starbucks v its better competitor Peet's

From the Sports Guy's mailbag:
SG: Not since the Dunkin Donuts coffee cake muffin has the country been in this much danger. I gained two pounds just from reading that e-mail. But you know what? I'll never know what the Starbucks breakfast sandwich tastes like, because they opened a Peet's Coffee near my house a few months ago … better coffee, friendlier people behind the counter, food freebies from time to time, the chance to say "large," medium" and small" again, and no crappy music being shoved down my throat? It's a dream come true. I even own my own Peet's debit card. Wait, should I be sharing all of this? Probably not.
EXACTLY. I order a medium coffee every day at 6am (none of this "tall/grande/venti" bullshit), and get to listen to classical music instead of Sheryl Crow's wailing. The ONLY coffee I find drinkable at Starbucks without cringing is Verona, with Sumatra a distant second. And yeah, I've got the Peet's debit card too. 5% off for each $20 you put on it. I don't even know the names of most Peet's coffee blends, I just had to learn the names of Starbucks' good ones so I wouldn't get coffee on the days they weren't brewing those. Ugh.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

On Splenda


This stuff can turn cat piss into the nectar of the GODS. (I haven't had cat piss, but I've had most of Starbucks' beans, and aside from Verona and perhaps Sumatra, most of them bear a remarkable resemblance to what I would imagine cat piss would taste like.) Anyway, I just bought a 400 count box of the stuff at Ralph's for 15 bucks. Couldn't even wait to hit up Costco for it. Oh well.

Incidentally, why the hell do people at the grocery store who are carrying baskets instead of pushing carts go up to the checkout line and drop the basket on the floor in front of the line with the handle bars criss-crossed over one another so that I have to bend over and risk substantial injury by uncrossing those bars so that I can then place MY basket neatly inside the other one? Why the hell do you need to make it harder for other people/store workers? Bastadges.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Best line from Scrubs this week

Elliott: JD, I really don't want to do this. Can't we just go home and put on our PJs and watch Grey's Anatomy?
JD: Oh! I really do love that show. It's like they watch our lives, take them, and put them on tv!

Owwweeeeeeee

And let's be honest here

What did the museum think would happen when they offered unlimited martinis for thirty bucks at an art show?

Setting the Outlook reminder for 10 years from now

184 proof whisky!

SEC CHAMPS!!!!